May Reflections: The Devil, Imposter Syndrome, and Allyship
Every year on Samhain (an ancestral pagan holiday, otherwise known as Halloween) I pull thirteen cards for my year ahead, one for every month and one for the year as a whole. When I started it was a practice of looking ahead for the future, though now I often use them as reflection tools as I pass through each month. This is a personal practice rather than a collective reading, but this particular month I felt that I would be remiss not to consider what I received for May 2020 without speaking to its application in the world outside of myself.
The Devil, much to my dismay, is often to be considered one of the scarier cards in the tarot, but he is truly one of my favourites. For those less familiar with tarot, The Devil is card number 15 of the Major Arcana (the vein of tarot that speaks to larger, more universal experiences by way of archetypal imagery) and is often depicted as some type of large beast-like figure behind 2 smaller human figures bound together in chains. The standard interpretation speaks to attachment, addictions, and shadow work, and while I don’t inherently disagree with this, I also believe it to fall short of the true wisdom the Devil gifts us. Before diving into the relevance of the Devil at this time, I have to first delve into the deep, and frequently misunderstood nature of this “beast.” Bear with me.
Numerologically, The Devil is related to The Lovers, each being or breaking down to 6, considered Aphrodite’s number, and incidentally, the periodic number for carbon (you know, the stuff we’re all made from). As such, 6 is considered to be one of the most nurturing numbers of the numerological system (think on that next time you contemplate the number of “the beast”). When we look to The Lovers, we see similar imagery; older decks often depict it as a cherub pointing an arrow at a man deciding between 2 women. The Lovers message is about choice, specifically the choice to not lust after things that appeal to your more shallow nature and instead choose things that will serve you long term and align with your values, even if it may require a little work on your end.
From this interpretation, and with their connected imagery, we can say that the Devil similarly has to do with work around choice - but rather than “playing it safe,” the Devil (or Lucifer, also considered the “guardian cherub”) asks you: “Would thou like to live deliciously?” What are your wildest dreams? What are the things you are lusting for? What’s preventing you from reaching out and grabbing them? What chains are holding you back? In the mythos of the Devil or Satan or Lucifer we understand he is cast out of Heaven because God denied Lucifer’s belief that humans should have free will. Do you fear repercussions? Are you afraid to fall? Are you afraid of what you would be capable of if you were not bound to some belief that may not even serve you?
Astrologically, The Devil is associated with the sign of Capricorn, Saturnian ruler of the 10th house of visibility (public life), power and influence. Being ruled by Saturn, Capricorn and thus, the Devil, have some nature of discipline assigned to them. With Capricorn considered the patriarch, and its opposite sign Cancer considered the matriarch, it could be easy to associate the Devil to a paternal, disciplinarian role, especially when we look to the images of chains that often accompany his depiction. However, this does not align with the archetypal mythology of his nature. If Lucifer (the Devil) only desired for people to have free will, why would he desire to place you in bondage? The answer is, he wouldn’t. The chains are not disciplinarian chains that he forces upon you, but rather the limitations placed upon you by constructs, external expectations or by yourself. The Devil is not a harbinger of restriction, but rather, a guide to help lead you beyond your limitations. The discipline arrives in the work that you must do to evolve (which is why the next card of the Major Arcana is the Tower, because in your evolution there will be layers that you must shed to continue on).
I was standing in my kitchen (probably looking for snacks) when I was struck that I needed to start offering tarot readings as a service. I questioned it. Though I first picked up tarot in the summer of 2014, I almost exclusively read for myself, and very occasionally for close friends. I have this thing called imposter syndrome, the belief that I’m not “good enough” to offer tarot or call myself a reader, though I’ve often had positive reinforcement from my readings. This imposter syndrome was my chain in early May. I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t a dream of mine to expand my practice to a place in which it would cohabitate with my more esoteric interests. Allowing myself to chase these dreams was what I thought the Devil’s wisdom was guiding me to chase, and it was — but this was just one of the messages for the month.
On May 25th a black man named George Floyd was murdered by Minneapolis Police, which commenced a chain of uprisings for racial justice throughout the United States that is still going strong now in early June. This is not the first series of protests dedicated to calling out the systemic racism so present in our country's police departments (and our country as a whole), but it has certainly been the strongest in its persistence over the past decade.
So what does the Devil tell us about this movement? For starters, everything that is occurring now has to do with bondage; bondage to the systemic racism the United States was not only founded upon, but has perpetuated for hundreds of years. This system of bondage has literally enslaved millions of black people across generations and has left present day black folks with a higher likelihood of food insecurity, poverty, arrest, imprisonment, and being murdered by those who claim to serve and protect us all. The difference here is that this bondage is not conceptual nor for black folks to escape without assistance, but rather a web of laws, actions, and learned behaviors that has been perpetuated by those with power, namely white people, who must now reconsider and work to reverse these aggressions.
The choice we are being presented with as a society is either to take our dreams of a world that actively serves each and every one of us better and make it reality, or to continue down the road of destruction we are all on that will only lead to more suffering. This will take significant discipline, especially from white folks, like myself, who will need to actively work to dismantle learned racism - both overt and covert, who will need to continue (or start) to listen and reframe their relationship with race, privilege and power, and who will need to continue to support and uplift oppressed creators, businesses and organizations so that we may level the playing field for everyone moving forward.
These lessons around discipline cannot be forgotten as we move into The Tower, where we are now just beginning to watch these structures crumble as calls to defund the police are starting to be heard in cities across the nation who are reconsidering their budgets to prioritize services such as education, housing and counseling. These lessons must not be forgotten as we eventually come upon The Star, when we begin to see the fruits of our labor and realize there is hope in the darkness, that a better world is possible. We must continue to choose to learn from each other. These lessons must carry us far into the future, to The World, through the next call to action.